I already warned you that there would be several posts in this series, so bear with me. As a follow-up to Dating Intelligent Women Part I, and Part II, I thought it essential that we define the creature to whom we refer. So, here goes...and feel free to add anything I may have left out. And I apologize in advance for my extreme sarcasm...
1. At least college-educated. Often graduate degree educated--Master's, PhD, or professional degree like MD or JD. The more letters that go after her name, the harder it gets to find a date. I've got MD, MPH.
2. Thoughtful about the world. Has opinions about politics, the war in Afghanistan, global warming, gay marriage, you name it. And she's not afraid to share them.
3. Socially intelligent. Knows how to network with people. Knows how to read people. Meaning she knows if you want to just knock her up or if you're actually interested in her mind. If it's the former, she may play along because she's decided that's all you're good for anyways.
4. Emotionally intelligent. This overlaps in a Venn diagram kind of way with #3. She is able to empathize with you, as well as analyze her feelings about you. This happens both in the recesses of her mind as well as at the spa or gym locker room with her girl friends. Yes, women do locker room talk better than men...which brings me to...
5. Sexually intelligent. She is mature and intelligent enough to know about STDs and birth control. And that may mean that she'll "accidentally" miss a pill so that she can finally have that baby, but what that means most of the time is that she'll take care of herself. And she's also experienced enough to ask for what she wants in bed.
I know a lot of these women. They are doctors, nurses, lawyers, engineers, and other professionals, who are well-read, well-rounded and often puzzlingly single. It may actually be that they have too much going for them. Most of them, in fact, feel very satisfied with their lives. Which means that unless men present them with a better option than themselves (read the description above #1 to #5) and show them a path to happiness that is brighter than the one they are already on, they are going to stay put. They know they too have options, they have worked hard to get to where they are, and they are perfectly capable of taking care of themselves.
Don't get me wrong--all of these women LOVE it when a man takes care of them, but he should match what they bring to the table. So, now who wants to write about "intelligent men?"
RIP - Davy Jones
3 days ago

4 comments:
My first visit and that's a loaded question and I'm 63, married three times, been financially, socially and mentally independent for many years and still can't describe that "intelligent man" perhaps because I wonder if they really exist or they are a myth..LOL my best,
Dorothy from grammology
grammology.com
I love your comment, Dorothy....here is my attempt to describe an intelligent man, but maybe you have some pearls of wisdom to add to it...http://conversationsaboutdating.blogspot.com/2009/12/intelligent-man.html
Great analysis, Bina. I would only add that I think "accomplished" is a better descriptor than "intelligent". I think there's a lot of intelligent women out there who have not had a chance, or are in the process of, becoming the woman you describe. They may be smart, but not yet self-assured and confident. Sometimes it takes time to figure out what we want (been there!).
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